Monday, 18 April 2011

Live-in relationship and our society???

Hi Friends,
Its our right to say our views/opinion about anything in this world.Can call it as personal opinion.I would like to say my opinion about live-in relation.Live-in relationship is a mutual understanding between two person of different sex or same sex to live together.They can share household luxurious & even indulge in sex with each others consent.And there is no concept of husband & wife at the same time both of them have equal rights.I can say a man will no authority over his female partner and vice versa.

If I say live-in relation is good and we can try it in life,then a huge number of people will come against it and will say about Indian culture,our tradition,our family relationships,family bonds,Our relationship values,moral side and of course the society will not agree with it.I'm sure,I'll be the odd one out.But I haven't seen these kind of opposition to the family who is asking dowry for marriage.I am from Kerala,So I know what is happening in the marriage market in Kerala.Without dowry the guy will not go for marriage,now you will say this may happen only in arranged marriage,God sake trust me,I can give one of my personnel experience,I have a friend,he is from a middle class family,after his Btech,he got a very good job with a good remuneration,he fell in love with a girl,she is Mtech from IIT,both from same religion & caste because of that both families also interested.The girl's family & the boy's family met each other.The interesting part is after the meeting,the boy's father had reached the girl through phone and informed they want 15L INR as dowry for the marriage.Later my friend is called informed the same to the girl,not to the girl's family.The intention was they need girl's support for the dowry.And the funny thing is boys' parents marriage was also love marriage.And my friend is pointing that his dad got a good amount as well as properties as dowry,so he is also expecting the same,and saying I will get min.30L INR & more beautiful girl than her.Unfortunately that time I was here in UK,otherwise I would have slapped him.He is the one who followed her for more than 1 year and requested for her love by saying sweet n sugaring words like ''without you,I cannot live''.Her family was not able to give the required amount as dowry,so my friend haven't married that girl,now she got marry with another guy and settled abroad.I really cant understand was his love towards that poor girl or towards the dowry??Why these guys can think about a dowry free marriage??

In some families,giving and getting dowry is their prestigious issue.Our society is against live-in relationship,but why the same society is not against to this bloody dowry system.Dowry is not applicable in live-in relationship,is that is the reason why society is against live-in relationships?Live-in relationship will affect the tradition & culture of our country.A lady's life is not important in our country,or its not relevant in our culture/tradition??

In live-in relationship,partners will get an opportunity to understand each other,whether the two are compatible or not.In this way we can reduce the number of divorce.We all will say the purity of 'Mangalsuthra'.But I believe a girl's life is more important than 'Mangalsuthra'.In live-in relationship,there is no mangalsuthra,or any religious formalities.Society is highlighting these points against live-in relationship.But my question is 'before creating an issue related to dowry,why the boy/his family/society giving value to the same 'Mangalsuthra'?.'Mangalsuthra don't have any value at that time,Is it conditional one??

After getting divorce from her husband,the girl will keep the same magalsuthra?why the society not insisting to keep the same one?In our country,people are adopting western culture and society gave a label that live-in relationship is western culture.I would like to ask one question 'God Krishna & Radha never married and they lived together,so that is also live-in relation,then how come it will be a western culture???And people who all are saying opposing Westernism,please mind they don't have dowry system and no girl is dying because of dowry issues.So that's the positive part of Westernism.
We can see lots of couples,they are adjusting each other,why?The reason is they got married,even if they are frustrated with each other then also just pulling their life for the society/family.Majority of them keeping parallel relation even after marriage?Is that's our culture/tradition?This will build a healthy society?

Selecting live-in relation/marriage is depends on person's interest and their privacy.Please give freedom to select their own way.If its live-in relation/marriage please commit into the relation and understand each other,avoid of cheating our own life.

Youngsters,if you are following western culture please mind EU's may drink,go for dating etc,but they don't have dowry system and they will not kill their wife for money/dowry..

If you guys have any opinion,you can share it here....all are welcome.........


  1. You are focusing mainly on dowry and money aspects Vinnie. But in case if a child born to that live in relationship, and if that relationship doesn't last, what about the future of those kids?

  2. After marriage,if the couple decide to for div,what about the future of the kids?After giving birth to baby,a female become 'mom'.Motherly/fatherly feeling is related to marriage?